Unraveling Limiting Beliefs
“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may become incapable of doing it.” -Mahatma Gandhi
Think back to a time when you doubted yourself, a time when you sold yourself short.
My guess is that your brain came up with an answer to that prompt pretty darn quick. Too quick. In fact, I might even venture to wonder if the time you thought back to was no more than a few days, a few hours, even a few minutes ago.
Your knee jerk reaction to such a prompt is the result of limiting beliefs, which are exactly what they sound like: Beliefs about yourself or the world around you that limit you, keeping you from making different, and likely, healthier, choices or holding your focus on the negative side of a set of circumstances.
For example, just to name a few common limiting beliefs:
- “I am not good, pretty, smart, talented, what-have-you enough.”
- “I don’t have the time for _____.” • “I don’t want people to think I’m _______.”
- “I can’t handle that.”
- “I’m probably going to fail anyway, so why bother trying?”
Sound familiar?
These all-too-common beliefs are a result of repeated thoughts that typically originate in childhood. The brain is extraordinarily malleable and impressionable at such a young age, and certain life events impact the immature brain more significantly because of an inability to decipher what is real and what is not. No, this doesn’t mean we can all point our fingers at our parents, screaming, “Look what you’ve done to me!” Rather, if we are pointing fingers at all, we would have to point at every person we ever crossed paths with at a young age—- coaches, grandparents, teachers… goodness, even the newscasters on the evening news your dad flipped on every night after work. No one has that many fingers or that much time on their hands. In fact, there is no blame here; there is only an understanding of where your limiting beliefs started so that you can more effectively stop them in their tracks.
Reality check: Science shows that the brain latches onto negative events a lot easier than positive, and if enough time passes where you grant that negativity affirmation, they become self-fulfilling prophecies instead. You’ve spent x number of years believing something that isn’t true, while also constantly looking for evidence to support it. In other words: You have your work cut out for you.
Subsequent reality check: As impressionable as the brain is at a young age, it is equally resilient as you grow older. You are strong, you are capable, and you have what it takes to dismantle these beliefs. With enough persistence and dedication, you’ll be well on your way to living up to your full potential.
Here’s how:
- First and foremost, pay attention. Be aware of instances where you are in “low-mood thinking,” interrupting yourself from making a certain choice, and then question whether it is related to a limiting belief. For example: A friend invites you to a party on Friday night. But you know going into it that you won’t know a lot of people there, so you question going, for fear that you are too socially awkward to make new friends. (Wait, what?! Who said you were socially awkward? And even if you are a little bit awkward, what if it’s the case that people will actually like you more for it and the fact that you are being yourself?)
- Look for evidence. You’ve spent a lot of time looking for support for your theory that you are, in this particular example, socially awkward. Instead, look for evidence that the opposite is the case. You went to the party (good for you!), and you had a lengthy and engaging conversation with a new person that you approached of your own accord (double whammy)! Take the time to acknowledge it yourself and notice how it was in direct opposition of your limiting belief.
- Take back what is yours. No more blame game. It is no one’s fault but your own that these beliefs have held power over you for so long. By recognizing that you are the one in control, you are that much more likely to upend your own limiting beliefs.
- Stop worrying about pleasing everyone. It isn’t possible. Plain and simple; it just isn’t attainable to make everyone happy. As soon as you come to terms with this, you can more readily chip away at the notion that something about you contradicts what people expect of you.
- Let’s talk chakras. Yoga is beneficial towards your mental health in so many ways, and one of those is by unearthing prana, the healing force that flows through your seven chakras. Limiting beliefs are going to create blockage in all your chakras, but let’s not bite off more than we can chew and instead just focus on two in this post:
The Solar Plexus Chakra: This chakra is responsible for low self-esteem, which is the most closely correlating result of limiting beliefs. It holds your individual power (a.k.a. the “take back what is yours-ism” that we talked about earlier), and a blockage of this chakra is often characterized by experiencing difficulty, making decisions or feeling that you’re susceptible to being taken advantage of. Boat pose, warrior three, and twists will activate it and promote prana in this chakra. Limited Thinking, step aside; Individual Power is coming through!
The Third Eye Chakra: The third eye is often considered the sixth sense that intuitively connects you to the outside world. If the third eye is compromised, you are more likely to be unable to assess the world around you in a healthy manner, becoming judgmental toward others and yourself. We can work on unblocking it with child’s pose, dolphin pose, and eagle pose.
6. Most importantly, know that you don’t have to do any of this alone. If you are ready to morph your limiting beliefs into empowering and self-serving ones instead, it is beneficial to talk it through with someone else. Please reach out to me any time to be that “someone else” for you. We can talk chakras and the lies you’ve told yourself since you were young, working towards freeing you from your limiting beliefs and uncapping your full potential.
Resources:
Forbes: Limiting Beliefs, What Are They and How Can You Overcome Them?
